As someone who has provided bereavement and loss therapy in Beaconsfield for a number of years, I have seen many clients make the same misconception about grief: namely, that it only happens when a person dies. This is simply not true. Grief comes after we experience an important loss of any kind, and it is this phenomenon of loss - and the many emotions that come with it - that I really work with as a bereavement counsellor.

To illustrate what I mean, here are three different ways we can experience grief that don’t involve someone passing away.

Breakups

Chances are, you’ve been through a breakup before. Many people have been through more breakups than they care to remember. We all remember that first heartbreak, and how it seemed more painful than anything else in the world. That feeling is no different to the grief one feels when someone dies. It creates a hollow feeling inside; you lose the motivation to do anything at all.

In the adult sphere, divorce naturally brings about a sense of grief as well. If someone who has been with you for many years is suddenly gone from your life, it is normal to feel bereaved. This can also be the case for a long-term friendship that ends on bad terms. As a parent, feelings of grief often arise if their child cuts them out of their life and refuses to speak to them again.

Being Sacked/Made Redundant

Jobs give us a sense of security and stability, but often we can have this safety net stripped from us at a moment’s notice. Due to the pandemic, and other factors, a lot of people were quickly released from their jobs without much warning, leaving them stranded in unemployment and uncertainty. Perhaps you have worked for a particular company for many years, with people you have come to know well. The workplace can become like a second family in this sense. When we lose it, that sense of grief can be extremely powerful.

Money Loss

If you are 30 years old or older, you will remember the panic and pain that came with the 2008 financial crisis. Many people lost assets they assumed would always be theirs; carefully accrued life savings vanished to nothing. This was a particularly bad time for people’s finances, but it can happen in many instances: court settlements, fraud, gambling issues, etc. Losing money can leave one feeling like they have nowhere to turn, that they have lost an essential part of themselves. That sense of despair is no different to when someone dies.

If you are having a hard time coping with a divorce, recent life transition, or any other loss that has happened in your life, I offer confidential bereavement and loss therapy in Beaconsfield or online. Feel free to get in touch with me to set up an initial consultation at any time.